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(Gringo, this one is dedicated to you)
It was after one of the long pauses. You were quiet, trying to find the right words .. or maybe cause you were hesitant.. and then you said
"Please don't hold it against me. but I can't live without you".
... and I was quiet. I understood the dichotomy of emotions. The hesitance and the love. The ugly beauty of it. You wanted to declare your love for me without paying the price for it. Putting up with the crap-side of romance, is not every one's cup of tea.
Long after you broke my heart and we were having one of our pretend-to-be-just-friends talk, I randomly asked you to make a blind promise... and I told you it wasn't going to be anything hard.
You said "I don't make promises".
"oh yeah, you don't".. I said with dripping sarcasm.
You laughed an unexplainable laugh and said "Shuker nahi kerti?'' (aren't you thankful for that)
My love, you just didn't get it.
...that love in itself is a promise. a promise wrapped in forever, sprinkled with unconditionality and total acceptance. Its a promise of complete, no-questions-asked forgiveness. If you feel it, you scream about it from the top of the hills and you whisper it to yourself, late at night. Love is the smile, you smile, when you're sleeping.
..but you just didn't get it
So I sit here, eons later... and I pray that may you live with that innocence, which smells of ignorance forever. May you never wake up in the middle of the night and rethink your life and your actions. May life always be a straight road for you; no curves, no bends. May you never feel sorrow. May you never ever experience the hurt of losing someone you loved ( my definition)...
May you never have to stop in your tracks and look back.
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7 comments:
Love is a curse no less.
And to love is to commit - and only a few, very few, can really stand to it.
Maybe people really understand they can't do all that true love asks of them and so they don't really commit - and well....there's a certain beauty to those unsaid words too..
beautiful words. love your blog :)
Beautifully written indeed. Nice blog :-)
Salman,
I understand what you mean by that. However, if thats how its going to be then why wait for the other person to be involved and then put the full stop. Begin with a full-stop then.
Paulo Coelho said (in fifth mountain)
"The Lord listens to the pryers of those who ask to be able to forget hatred, but is deaf to those who want to flee love"
...and I totally agree with him.
@Kacy and Desiskeptic
Thanks a lot =D
Oh man! What a monster!
And it is too Mother Teresa-ic of you to wish him well. I wish the sucker fries in hell every night.
zamana he aisa hai, aadhi duniya ka damagh kharab ho chukka hai. par tussi tension kioon lainday o sohniyo.
There is nothing easy about love except falling into it...
Beautifully written :)
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