4:17 PM

Do you think I should try "Unconciousness" now?..

In 2006-09 we have lost around 10,000 lives in Pakistan due to various acts of terrorism*






You know how people often say "I have blocked that out"... referring to some all-time-heavy, bad-ass, painful memory which they like to not think about.

Yeah, so I dont do that... I can't .... Or maybe I can... Just never tried it out.

However I do have this place. Deeeep inside my conciousness. So deep, that place is that it can also be referred to as an almost-sub-conciousness.

I normally visit it when I am womanscaping my...whatsthewordforvajajayIcanuseandmaybenotembarrasmybrotherincasehereadsthis ...she-garden???... Other then that I can't think of anytime when I needed to go there ever.

Now I do. Everyday.

I somehow can't think of a better way to deal with all thats happeneing. The blasts are everywhere.

Newspapers. Blogs. TV. Random conversations in the office kitchen. E mails. SMS's

I hate doing that random head-google I do, everytime I hear about a blast.... Who lives there?.. Is he okay?... Does Bestfriend273621 live in recentlybombedplace in lahore?..

I hate sending the head-count sms's.

I hate that traffic jams make me nervous.

I hate that I switch the channel when I hear blast news.

I hate that I felt guilty about partying on Halloween.

I hate that the other day I thought twice before posting a comment on my friend's profile. I became edgy right after I typed ''Have a blast''...

...and yeah that place. Its not really working like it did before ...

Who could have thought something could hurt more than that!



*Wikipedia - http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Violence_in_Pakistan_2006-09

13 comments:

Americanising Desi said...

is hate the real word?
i think it is more of being scared than hate and we are all in the same position. Islamabad has been effected but we down here in Karachi are more terrorized. we leave for work everyday thinking we might never come home in the evening.

Minerva said...

Sigh.

It's a shame isn't it.

10 thousand lives.

That's 10 thousand families affected.

And who's going to be accountable?

Annie said...

Losing a loved one like that.

One day talking to them about something random, and then not ever having to see them again...

and that feeling of helplessness... the madness of that loss. Of the whole Situation.

That excruciating pain.

I can't believe this happens again and again, everyday... and that its gonna happen again.

its just sad. So very sad!

and I remember the time when I felt all that ...and so yeah, I am scared.. and I hate that I have to be reminded of it all again and again... its a lot of things I guess ...

the sheikh said...

Head count sms's is really weird. I don't think I'd be able to do that.

Not getting a reply back for whatever reason would just scare you.

Annie said...

Yeah I know. First it was just the blasts, and in the recent past its been quakes ... I feel like ChickenLicken..

Cheema Changezi said...

It's high time that callous terrorists realized their responsibilities. God can't just depend on his poor little earthquakes and floods for wreaking havoc on the earth anymore, now that people have earthquake-proof buildings.

Farhan said...

I can't get the sight of a road accident out of my head, involving someone I didn't even know.
I don't know how one comes to terms with losing a loved one.

Balvinder Balli said...

What do these "Maut ke Saudagar" want ?

Annie said...

I guess we all try to understand that, everyday. I can't agree that religion is their cause. Freedom can't be it, either.. they had freedom, thats how they got to this place. Its just Sad.

Balvinder Balli said...

But Annie, i feel that religion is the mother of all violence. Gone are the days when battles were fought for women (Sita and Helen of Troy).

Yesterday a Major Saahib of American Army killed 12 of his colleagues and before shooting he cried aloud "Allah Hoo Akbar"

Most of today's killings are going on in the name of religion only. And i don't only mean Islam here but even the fanatics from other religions e.g., Hindus, Sikhs, Jews etc kill innocent people in the name of God.

Vipul Grover said...

Well, I don't want 2 sound patronising but it indeed hurts 2 hear about frequent bomb blasts in pakistan.. Sadly or rather luckily, the root of terrorism in both our nations is the same, so can b dealt with combined synergy.. But wats stopping those who can do sumthing about it is the fear of commitment.
Well, intrnational relations r also like personal relationships aftrall!

Asfandyar said...

@Balvinder:

To be honest the root of all violence is simply man. Us. Humankind.

Take us out of the equation and there won't be any wars. Take religion out of the equation and we'll fight over money. Take that out, and we'll fight over land. Erase that, and we'll fight over women.

It's in our nature to control and exercise power - and substantial power nearly always leads to dictatorial tendencies. Thus, we pillage, rape, murder and maim - and so the cycle continues.

Salman Latif said...

It's simply the retarded policy-making of yester-years that has brought us to this.
And we see every other media person telling us how we need to 'unite' against it and favor the military operation - will that help? I believe it barely would.
We need to make long-investments - alleviate living conditions and bump the literacy rate. And we may be purged of the committed sins to which we are thus punished now.